How to Lose Weight With Cayenne Pepper
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Try doing NOTHING.Will all your good intentions, you're doing more harm than good.You cannot change people, especially in a relationship.If you express your desire for her to get healthier, she cannot get healthier for herself.She would feel she's doing it for you.She cannot take charge of her life and control herself if she's been controlled by someone else.She must resent you for that on some level.I used to smoke which bothered my husband, a social smoker.He kept pestering me about it.He was annoyed by my smoking and I was annoyed by his constant judging of me, like I was doing something wrong, which I was, both to myself and to him (second hand smoking).So he could have a righteous attitude and I could just feel guilty??I could have moved to chain smoking out of resentment but I held on to the one pack/day nicotine addiction which was very hard as the body gets used to any drugs so you get lesser effect so you fight it daily or smoke more or quit when you have enough of the BS.It is only when my husband FINALLY wore out and gave up about the issue of my smoking and stopped addressing that subject (probably ending up hating me because of his failure as I never yielded to him), that I felt that he accepted me for who I was, the good and the bad (I was already a smoker when we married, no surprise there) for better and for worse, no matter what, blah-blah-blah, that I could FINALLY stop smoking!I quit for myself, not because my husband wanted me to do so since he stopped “talking” about my nicotine addiction.I even had to do it when he was on a 10 days business trip to remove myself from his influence as even his support would have pissed me off at this point (when going through withdrawal, you get pissed off by anything and anybody).You do not “talk” to your wife…you're “pestering” her so she goes on the defensive and shows you the door.Surely, do not think that she literally wants you to leave, she does NOT.That is actually the last thing she would want to happen, short of a solar flare destroying planet Earth.That's how a woman feels when she wants to do something (even if it's unhealthy) and her husband does not want her to do it.Same with men with nagging wives because she has to remind him for years to fix or install something he could fix or install in 10 minutes with one of the power tools she got him as gifts (lots of women appreciate a handyman at home), and she knows if she would try to do it, without any knowledge (except maybe, where is that stud in the wall?) and without the power tools that she's too scared to use, she would massacre the wall like the last time she tried to install something on a wall, took her hours, made a big hole in the wall, did not have time to make dinner…so the husband comes home, there's a big hole in the wall where the iron table hook was supposed to go, dinner is not even cooking and the wife is pissed off to no end because his procrastination made her feel incompetent about her practically non-existent DIY skills and wasting hours trying and failing to do something he could have done in minutes.I'm not sexist…women can do DIY projects (they're targeted by home improvements ads nowadays) and men can cook…it's just a matter of interest/need, learning and division of tasks.You have taken over cooking to cook healthier but in your case, you did not do that because you're single and have no wife to cook for you while you're working so your wife could see that as another attempt to try to control her or worse make her feel guilty that when you're working, she orders junk food instead of making homemade meatballs and pasta with a marinara sauce.You can cook healthy if you want, for you; make enough for your wife (family size because of her weight) but DO NOT imply that you expect her to eat it. Make sure she knows it's her choice to eat your delicious Broccoli Egg Divine dish as an appetizer and then she can order a pizza (the blame is on you, you did not cook enough).Just the BMR is around 1,700 calories for a 37yo, 5'4 and 210lbs woman (if she'd lie in bed all day long). My Broccoli Egg Divine family size dish for 4 has 300 calories per serving (with butter, Swiss cheese, 6 eggs, Hollandaise sauce, bread crumbs). Your wife would need half of it (600 calories) + eating some nuts before and dessert after…as 600 calories is not enough for dinner if your BMR is 1,700 calories.Let her regain control of her life and health.Even if your wife wants to lose weight and be healthier, which she probably does, just like I wanted to stop being a smoker when I was one (obese people want to lose weight just like smokers want to stop smoking, the ones pretending otherwise are either in denial or lying or maybe on the defensive mode), she could only do it or even come to the realization of knowing that it is what she wants only if it's her decision and not because you're pushing her.…/…Other Answers:
- There are foods that have the same taste as her favorites but it has lower sodium, calories and etc. that would a great try!
- Honestly, there is nothing you can do if she doesn't want to. I'm sorry. Maybe research the risks of obesity and have a serious talk to her and express your concerns.
- She's just being stubborn. I use to be unhealthy but not fat, I'm more "skinny fat" so I have more fat but less muscle which isn't good. I got motivated by all these pages on Instagram which are like pages more motivation to work out and eat healthier. So far it's some what working because every time I see it I wanna work out and have nice sculpted and built body. But ya it just seems she's stubborn so the only way is to get her to realize it herself. Hope this helps and good luck! :)
- Her attitude seems to be something like "You can either like it or lump it" so there is probably nothing further you can do as she actually said something like "If you don't like it then there is the door".Getting people to change their lifestyle is often a losing battle so often you have to accept people as they are if they are unwilling to change.For weight loss, dieting is more effective than exercise. Reducing your intake of junk sugar will help as in items 22 and 106 in http://www.rheumatic.org/sugar.htm The natural sugars in fruits are OK as they are metabolised to glucose slowly due to their high fiber content. Fruits are low in calories and are not fattening. Most fruits and vegetables are metabolism boosting foods and that helps for weight loss.
- …/…Learn a little about psychology and human behavior.Like when you will have kids and you will raise them better and easier if you know about child behavior, like toddlers throwing tantrums to learn where their boundaries are…if you give up, they'll control you and it's a constant battle. My kids just had a couple of tantrums and that was it because it did not work…I stayed calm, ignored them (not even feeling embarrassed in public) and never bought them anything in a store when they were asking for it (the next time, maybe, if they don't ask for it, but instead use good behavior and body language, like smiling, to make sure you know they still want it).With your wife, it's learning about relationships…that's a doozy!!You're saying “I'm not going to leave”…what if your wife would straighten her act, lose weight, get healthy, fit, strong and toned with sexy muscular curves and in her 40s, SHE leaves you for a better looking or richer guy??Some husbands do not want their wife to look better because she could leave them.Wives know that when a husband is starting to look/dress better, exercise more, stretch awkwardly at home…he's having an affair or getting ready to have one.What if you meet someone new with whom you can take the dogs for walks and do things and she pretends to like that, in 15 years, when you hit your late 40s/50s manopause (men call their manopause “midlife crisis”)?Women often pretend to like what men like (but really hate it) and keep their weight in check…then they get married and don't have to pretend anymore or diet & exercise.She cannot “eat healthy” as long as she does not make the decision, by herself, by her OWN self, to eat better, for her SELF…only then will you be able to help her if you “have taken over cooking to cook healthier”, like offer support, but it's still way down the line since YOU first have to go through the process of accepting her for who she is and express your love independently of her weight.I could even speculate that the healthier you cook, the more junk food she'll buy/order, like to counterattack and feel she's not completely being controlled by you.It's almost like YOU have a problem to fix (control) before your wife can fix her problem (being free from your control and making her own decision to eat better).You can cook healthy meals if you want, for YOUR self and not make any comment about what junk she orders (that's what the “doing NOTHING” mean at the beginning of my answer). Cook a lot so she can feel that there is enough for her to eat your healthy delicious homemade meal, if she wants…cook a meal all day long in a slow cooker, or for an hour in a rotisserie…nobody can resist the smell and it's so much tastier than junk food. Learn to make homemade pizza with her favorites toppings, using healthy ingredients, healthy oils (unlike cheap, greasy restaurant ones) and notice if she wants to order a pizza.And even if she wants to order a crappy restaurant pizza over your homemade delicious healthy one that smelled great out of the oven, don't take it personally.Let her eat what she wants and eat what you want so she can switch to your side on her own…oops…not to your side, just HER healthier side.When somebody cooks a meal and it smells like my idea of a meal in Heaven and I'm welcome to it…I'll drop my leftover homemade potato salad with shallots, anchovies and an olive oil vinaigrette (which is pretty good too, but I like to eat what other people cook, tastes different from my recipes) and be thankful for it.My homemade potato salad can last another day in the fridge.Bringing up the risk of obesity?I could not care less about the risks of cigarette smoking when I was a smoker and I knew the statistics and did research.I could only stop smoking for myself when my husband FINALLY got off my case.Do not have a “serious talk” (pestering, nagging…) about the risks of obesity and that she should be under medical care for obesity related diseases or you'll just make her feel that you think she's stupid to not be able to research that online. She's a grown woman in her late 30s, not a clueless teenage girl.I don't like the “she's being stubborn” answers. She's not a stubborn child. She needs to regain control of her life and here you are, preventing her to do that by telling her what to do and what she should eat and that she should go to the doctor.Unless she's stupid or willfully committing slow suicide, she freaking knows that she needs to be under medical supervision for obesity related diseases (she “refuses”…what? she should just do an annual checkup and not be forced into anything by anybody trying to control her…I wonder who that is…).And no, she's not “fine with it” (stands for Freaked out, Insecure, Neurotic and Emotional) but surely wishes you would back off and do some introspection about your own behavior that is sabotaging her.
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